This IS me!
THE GOURMET GIRL
First we eat, then we do everything else.
-- MFK Fisher
The Gourmet Girl is a Foodie with a capital F. All her activities seem to revolve around food, even when she's on vacation. She'd prefer to be mushroom hunting, sampling the wine country, or making a culinary tour of the South of France with the Michelin restaurant guide tucked under her arm. Or she might just rent a villa and spend the entire time in the kitchen, cooking elaborate dinners for friends and family.
Here's the key to the Gourmet Girl: she's a connoisseur. She appreciates the finer things, and she'll gladly pay more for them. She will shell out $1.59 for a blood orange instead of 69 cents for the navel variety, and it's not because they are fancier and more expensive. She doesn't care about status or prestige. For the Gourmet Girl, it's all about quality (Very true). She selects cars and clothes -- anything she buys -- based on how well they are made. While the Uptown Girl may sleep on high-thread-count, all-cotton sheets simply because she always has, the Gourmet Girl does it because, like The Princess and the Pea, she can feel the difference. (You reallly can)
She Might Be a Gourmet Girl if:
1. She drives: a practical car, often higher end. Japanese or European, but always highly rated (Gourmet Girls do their research). Volvo, Volkswagen, Honda, etc.
2. She can talk for more than ten minutes about: The difference between a California chardonnay and a French sauvignon blanc.
3. She begins her sentences with: "Jeffrey Steingarten says..."
4. She'd never: drink wine out of a box. (True)
5. She owns any of the following: Kitchen Aid mixer (Yes), a complete set of All Clad pots and pans (Yes), Silpat baking mats (Yes), tins of foie gras she brought back from France (Would be yes if I weren't against force feeding ducks til their liver is fat and bloated. But i do have fleur de sel from 2 different provences).
THE PROGRESSIVE GIRL
Moderation in all things, excess in nothing.
Imagine that the Girl Next Door moved to the big city. Think of Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally. She's America's sweetheart (I really am) with an urban sensibility. She's a post-Christian spiritualist, a pre-Monica Clintonite, and a dues-paying member of at least one social-change organization like NOW, Planned Parenthood, or the Sierra Club. You won't find her at an Earth First or PETA meeting, though. Those are the Granola Girl's stomping grounds. Progressive Girls want the world to be a better place, but they live out their politics in a moderate, left-of-center way (Completely true).
If you are going to date a Progressive Girl, the one sin you can commit is to be a chameleon. Molding your opinions to fit hers will lose her respect. One very positive thing you can do is offer her new experiences -- the Progressive Girl is fearless about trying new things. Whether it's pluralism, skydiving, Asian peanut sauce, or this book, the Progressive Girl is always looking for new ideas.
She Might Be a Progressive Girl if:
1. She drives: a small SUV but really wishes it got better mileage; once she can get a good hybrid, she will.
2. She can talk for more than ten minutes about: just about anything.
3. She begins her sentences with: "Susan Sarandon says..."
4. She'd never: pass up the chance for a new experience.
5. She owns any of the following: a water filter (Yes), a tabletop fountain (Yes), an acre of rain forest, a mutt from the pound (Two. Handicapped ones even).
I'm having an interesting semester at school so far. During my first week, I met two professors who, I'm sure, you will hear a lot about in the next few months.
One, who is teaching a pyschology course, is probably one of those genius types with no social skills. In the first few minutes of class, he introduced himself and then wrote his name and his resume on the board. Interesting, but I don't really care where he got his education or where he's worked - this is a gen. requirement class, who cares what his credentials are? The reason he is worthy of mention is that he did something I've never heard of anyone doing before. Under his college, he wrote summa cum laude and his GPA. Now, I'm not trying to undermine his achievement or anything, but he graduated over 30 YEARS AGO. Have you ever met someone for the first time and had them say, "Hi. I'm Bill and I graduated summa cum laude." When does that ever come up in conversation?? I mean, besides your mom telling her friends?
Then he spent 15 minutes telling us about why he never got his doctorate. (I am getting the feeling that this guy is insecure.) Then the next 20 minutes were about his college, his life there, famous people who went there, etc... And it's not like we're talking about an ivy league school - no one had even heard of this place.
My second instructor, we'll call her Ms Crazy Mood Swing is a serious nut job. The class started out well enough - it's an advanced writing course (which I was dreading because I hate writing when other people are making me do it). She has decided that instead of reading some stories and writing about them, we will do things that have practical applications in real life - like resumes, brochures and portfolio designing. I started to get excited about the class. It went well until we got to the schedule part of the syllabus. Since she also teaches the same class as a daytime class that meets 3 times a week (ours is once a week at night) she arranged her syllabus by weeks and then under the heading of "week 1" she listed the 3 dates of the morning class meetings and then lists the in class work in one column and the homework in another for each of the dates. Someone in my class didn't understand that as a once a week class, for assignments, we should look at everything listed for the week instead of going by date. Not a big deal.
She tried to explain it to him, but did a bad job of it and only confused him more. (The problem being mostly that she didn't explain that we had an assignment due on the first day of class so it threw him off because he was reading it like the week 1 assignment was due on week 2).
When he still didn't understand, she freaked out and started yelling at people. She got a little manic and it kinda freaked me out. Then, we got the following email from her....
Your assignments were due via e-mail! In your syllabus I state that your assignments will be e-mailed under "submission of assignments. I should have the following:
1. Letter to the editor
2. A link to the article that you are responding to or cut and paste the article into MS word and send it as an attachment.
4. Traditional resume
This assignment was due on Wed. I gave you all class to work on it so we should not have any problems. I asked you over and over again if you needed help. If they are late then I will take off points for it being late. You had a whole week to work on it. However, for THE REST OF THE SEMESTER I WILL STICK TO MY LATE POLICY. This means I WILL NOT ACCEPT HOMEWORK THAT IS NOT SENT VIA E-MAIL and NOT SENT on time. WORK ON PEER REVIEWS! SEND THEM TO YOUR GROUP MEMBERS BEFORE LATE TUESDAY NIGHT! IF YOU DON'T E-MAIL THEM TO YOUR GROUP ON TIME I WILL HERE ABOUT IT VIA E-MAIL SO PLEASE FINISH THIS ASSIGNMENT!
Your final draft and your letter to the editor are due on Monday at the beginning of class if you are my MWF classes and on Wed. You know the due date now and I want it on time! No delays!"
So... yeah. It's going to be a looong semester.
Mine, not surprising to me.
1. Have you ever wanted to sleep with a woman? If so, when?
I don’t consider myself bisexual, and I’ve never wanted to experiment with women (even in my college years) because really, the thought of oral sex with a woman creeps me out. But there are some women in the world that are so god damn gorgeous and have such a magnetic personality, that I think I could get over my squeamishness. Angelina Jolie, Salma Hayek, Catherine Zeta Jones, Charlize Theron. I would do them. I don’t know any “normal” women that I would do anything more than kiss.
2. Did you ever cheat on any of your significant others in the past?
I have never cheated on anyone I have dated. Ever. The only time I have even dated more than one person at a time was when my first long term relationship told me he wanted us to “see other people, but we could still date too”. I took him up on that, because, hell…he was seeing other people before he made that comment. I, unlike him, never slept with the other people I dated though.
I have been “the other woman” once though. It lasted two weeks before my catholic guilt ended it.
3. If you could have any job in the world, what would it be, and why?
I was thinking about this recently. I love to cook for other people. I love to entertain. So either a professional chef or a party planner. Or both. A caterer maybe?
4. How pretty exactly is Cilla?
Fucking gorgeous. She’s the cutest damn dog in the world.
5. Why end your nickname with an i and not a y? (:
Because with a “y”, it’s an adjective, not a name. Because with a “y”, it reminds me of a girl that I hate. Because it just looks better with an "i".
Do you want to be "interviewed"? Tell me, and I'll ask YOU 5 questions.
You, gentle reader, have a right to know something about who you're reading, so...5 quirks.
1. Like piquancy, I cannot stand to have my food touch. Watching other people deliberately mix their food, like mashed potatoes and corn (god! I can't stand it!!) is enough to make me lose my appetite. Rather than spending a lot of time carefully pushing food around to make it not touch, I never put more than 2-3 food items on a plate together, and I usually end up eating off at least two plates. I have used up to 4 plates while eating a single dinner. Some tips for the not-food wise: Bread does not mix with sauce. Do not serve my garlic bread sitting in the middle of my pasta. The bread gets soggy and it’s gross. Items with running juices should ALWAYS get their own plate. And "It all ends up in the same place anyway" is NOT a valid argument.
I also have to have all my food “ready” (cut or de-shelled and seasoned) before I can start eating. Other people will eat crab legs as they crack them. I get a heaping plate of them and then crack every single one and transfer the meat to another plate in a nice big pile. Then I butter and salt it, and then go wash my hands. THEN I can eat.
I have a lot of food “issues” but really, that could take up several days worth of posts. Maybe I’ll tell you about them sometime.
2. Also like piquancy, I separate my m&m's and skittles. But instead of eating them by colors, I separate them into individual piles and then I count them. Each color has to have the same amount as the rest. I start by eating the excess and then I take one of each color and put it in a separate pile. Once that pile is gone, I make a new pile of one of each color until they are all gone. The red one is always the last one eaten. Green is always first.
3. I am anti-social. Definitely un-Libran of me. I really don't like people. For the most part, I find them stupid, annoying and, oh yeah, stupid. (This is mostly strangers and family however. My friends are not stupid, they can occasionally be annoying, but they are definitely not stupid.) So, I don't enjoy family reunions (I try to only talk to my sister if I can help it, because she feels the same way), I don’t like talking to strangers, I don’t like going to lunch with co-workers all that often and I don’t answer my phone very often. Once you get me talking or socializing, I’m fine. But it takes some doing to get me over the hump.
4. I have a salt problem. I get salt cravings. I have turned people’s stomachs sometimes with the amount of salt I put on my food before I eat. If I don’t finish all my food, it HAS to be thrown away because no one else can eat it. I have been known, in the absence of salty foods, to eat salt straight from the shaker. I salt salad, bread, pizza, and anything not containing at least a cup of sugar. (Although – if you really want to try a little bit of heaven…get hold of a salted Brittany caramel by Thomas Haas. It’s a fluid caramel covered by dark chocolate and flakes of sea salt. This is the only exception to the “sugar and salt don’t mix” rule. For my Cincinnati friends, you can get them at Marble Hill Chocolatiers in Obryanville).
5. I’m a list maker. Really, it’s the only reason I’m doing these quirks. Cause it’s a list. I have almost everything I own on a list. Every book, every DVD, every cd. They’re organized in an access database so I can run queries on things like, all movies with Nicholas Cage in them, or all rated R movies, or all books by John Sandford. Before I got married, all of my movies were organized in alphabetical order and numbered. The number was added to the database so I could always find the movie in question (as in movies 1-30 are in rack 1, movies 100-180 are in the video cabinet, etc…). My husband pretty much ruined that system however.
I make hundreds of to-do lists each month. Since I was 6, I have had a list of all the people I would ask to be in my wedding, all the photos I would want taken, and a song list for the dj that I have updated every year. (I finally got to use them last year).
I have a vacation list that tells me what to pack based on the length of the trip and the temperature range.
I have a list of all the gifts I’ve received or given, who they were from (or to) and what the occasion was since 1992. My Christmas list for 2006 is already made out.
I have a list of rules and cool things I want to do with my kids (I don’t have any yet).
My sister bought me a book of lists. It gives you a topic such as “10 animals I’d like to own as a pet” and then 10 lines for you to fill in. I filled them all in and then bought myself another one.
This is another topic that could go on for days…so I’ll just leave it at this and maybe you’ll learn more another time. That is, if you want to come back.
FOUR JOBS YOU'VE HAD IN YOUR LIFE
FOUR MOVIES YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER (COULD? I HAVE!)
Chronicles of Riddick
The entire LOTR trilogy (back to back)
FOUR CITIES YOU'VE LIVED IN
FOUR TV SHOWS YOU LOVE TO WATCH
Law & Order
Will & Grace
FOUR PLACES YOU'VE BEEN ON VACATION
At least one major city in every state east of the mississippi.
St Thomas/St Maarten
FOUR WEBSITES YOU VISIT DAILY
Sweetly Pazzo's blog site
FOUR OF YOUR FAVOURITE FOODS
FOUR PLACES YOU'D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW
Some other place warm
Another warm place
And, oh, I don't know...Someplace warm?
Happy Birthday to you.
Happy Birthday to you.
Happy Birthday dear nstiv,
Happy Birthday to you!
So, I started this journal because I had to have a profile in order to post a comment on another journal (which I didn't end up doing). My husband told me the other journal was just a joke, which makes my plan to leave witty but scathing remarks completely tearing down the ass-clowns that attracted my wrath, well...futile. And that disappoints me. Because really, what else is there to do besides make fun of other people who are not crew??
And so now I have this journal. And I don't know what to do with it.
It only took, what? A year? But I've finally created my own journal. Happy Piquancy?